Beautiful: The Carole King Musical

hocuspatroclus:

arnold schwarzenegger wants to be fiyero in a production of wicked, so he goes to audition, but sees that they’ve already found someone for that role.

"thats okay," he consoles himself, "i’ll be boq."

  1. stephen sondheim:Lawyer's rather nice, if it's for a price, order something else, though, to follow, since no one should swallow it twice!
  2. me:OH MY GOD THAT"S WORDPLAY AND THEY'RE EATING PEOPLE AND LAWYER JOKES
  3. stephen sondheim:then you career from career to career
  4. me:HOW DID HE DO THE THING WITH THE SAME WORD WITH DIFFERENT MEANINGS
  5. stephen sondheim:the woods are just trees, the trees are just wood
  6. me:JESUS FUCKING CHRIST THAT IS SO FUCKING TRUE HOLY SHIT

thefutureauthor:

but seriously imagine mr. and mrs. granger getting a letter from hogwarts in hermione’s second year

"what the fuck do you mean our daughter turned herself into a cat

how the fuck is that possible

how did you not catch her making a fucking cat potion”